Tag Archives: exs

The past should stay in the past???

As you’re well aware, I’ve just got back from my first trip home in two and a half years – Cue catching up with family (the usual family politics, oh the joy!), friends (marriages and christenings – can someone please tell me when the memo went round to grow up?!) and the inevitable… exs! Always a joy, ahem!

So I left Australia, after a coffee catch up with the questionable one I boarded my flight – Manchester bound! I am one of those weird people who loves to fly long distances, a bit of peace and quiet with only myself to think about and an endless supply of alcohol, can someone please tell me what’s not to love hey?!

On a side note, my friends have often described me as having a swinging brick in my chest as opposed to a heart – how very dare they?! Essentially referring to the fact that I never, ever cry. Especially not at sad films, honestly the gasps of shock and horror that I get when I proclaim that I did not cry at The Notebook, or The Green Mile, Titanic or Armageddon! Sure I appreciate that they’re sad stories, but sad enough to make me actually shed a tear, erm no!

So imagine my complete shock and horror as the floodgates opened as I touched down in Manchester for the first time in a long time. I was greeted by my mum and dad, which was lovely and headed straight to the pub, via my cousin’s house for a quick makeover – blonde highlights, check! New do, check! Ready to be seen in public, check!

Now I have been known to ramble on in these posts and my aim in not to bore you senseless, so in my infinite wisdom I’ve decided to break down the trip into dating categories (I honestly don’t know how I do it, I was only home for three weeks and my update requires categories – who do I think I am honestly?!)

The first one is here for your viewing pleasure:

Reunions and tears at sunrise – The Christening

To follow shortly:

On the Other Side: The half Maltese, half English one (sound familiar?!) There’s a reason for that

Blast from the past: How to be a complete question mark

How to make every possible situation worse – The Wedding

A funny for you in the meantime!

He he

Words fail me (kind of)

So we’ve all had our fair share of dating disasters, what just me then? Ok! Well I certainly have – further to my lovely guest blogger’s post last week, it got me to thinking about who I’ve dated in the past and when I’ve had those WTF was I thinking moments!

Whether it was low self esteem, blinded by someone being ‘nice’ to me, or just the wrong person at the wrong time – there has been some guys that I’ve dated that are so left of centre that I actually judge myself.

As much as I joke about the Kiwi Poet and The Crier, I at least really liked them for who they were, if I had my time again I would probably still date them and make the same mistakes as its all life experience right?!  Apart from the odd couple, that I wouldn’t go as far to shake a stick at as it would be a waste of my energy, seriously!

There was this one guy in particular that wasn’t ideal, not ideal at all! (That’s putting it mildly!)  I was seeing him about a year and a half ago, where do I start?  I used to work with this guy and thought that he was a genuinely nice person, after dating him for a couple of weeks a series of events saw the mask slip very, very quickly!

It all started when he left me on my own in the cinema as he had a tantrum because he didn’t realise it was a work thing and not just me and him. Oh and then amongst other thing, there was the time that he stole my car… yes that’s right you read correctly  – on NYE I drove to his friend’s house party in N Sydney so that he could use it to drive to work the next morning. Only he had another one of his insecure episodes that night so I decided that I didn’t really want him to take my car without me being there… too late he ran off and disappeared with the keys and I didn’t hear from him for 12 hours.

That was until he phoned me the next day to tell me he’d ‘accidently’ put petrol in my diesel car, when I asked him if he’d driven it since he made the mistake – he said “no!” Only he was lying and had actually driven for 2km before breaking down – it was the lovely lady from Green Flag that had to phone me to break the news to me as he was too scared!

To his credit, he did pay for the engine to be fixed and then sent me flowers to say sorry (yeah flowers?!). Cue a barrage of sorry texts saying how much he’d screwed up and how he wanted another chance – Perhaps not surprisingly, I didn’t want to entertain him anymore, so I politely told him that it wasn’t going to work. Cue crazy stalker person alert! He phoned about a million times and sent me the most appalling messages, the icing on the cake culminated in him telling me how I would never be loved as I am from a broken home, charming!

It got me to thinking about my friend and guys they’ve been seeing, they too have been out with their fair share of, what can I call them, ‘non-desirables’. I guess like my guest blogger pointed out, we are there for our friends through the good and the bad times because we know that if it were to come full circle we know they would be there for us in a heartbeat.

My friends were a god-send; they provided advice and listened to me when I need someone to talk to. I am also the same when it comes to my friend’s needing advise – I tell them what I honestly think is for the best and make sure I’m there for them no matter what they decide to do – whether I agree with it or not – because that’s what friend’s do.

Here’s the e-mail for your viewing pleasure that the crazy stalker person ( I refer to him as this as he no longer represented in anyway shape or form the guy that I was seeing) sent to me the morning after the night of abusive text messages. (Note the subject – yes I am being serious, this is what it said word-for-word)

“Subject: Please read this it’s not mean…

Im sorry for the things I said on Friday night.  I don’t mean them, I said them out of anger.  Your right and I’m man enough to admit when I’m an idiot.  I’m really in a bad way.  I know you’ll think I’m doing this in an attempt to meet you or whatever but I’m not.  Your right we don’t belong together.  I think deep down your a genuinely beautiful person.  I am really sorry for that comment about your parents its got nothing to with anything I said it out of anger.  I have just realised that if I get a call from either of these jobs they are going to check my references regardless.  I have your name and number as the XX reference, key to either job.  I leave it in your hands with how your going to respond to them. 
The logistics job will be full on but its primarily broking so obviously very serious, its more sales though amazing potential etc.  I’m sorry I have to put this on you.  The reason I ‘hate’ you so much is because I wanted you more than you wanted me.  I haven’t felt attached to someone so quick and it hurt.  I can’t just go to being friends with someone I really care about, that’s why I was so mean etc.  I want to be a part of your life but I think it will only end up hurting me and then you more. 
I hate the way I treated you I really do I wish only the best for you and really do believe you’ll be somebody for sure.  Of course you know this but I needed to correct that.  I know I said you won’t but you will be fantastic at whatever you do.  You have achieved what you want on your own in another country without family.  Seriously weldone.  I hope in my life I will be just as fortunate.  Take this as what you want but you literally have the power to give me or not give me a job. 


In this instance – words fail me… yes, yes I know!!!!