I was browsing the web recently when I came across an article on Men’s Health written by Samantha Daniels, founder of Samantha’s Table, a dating service based in New York and Los Angeles, to list the top ten things to keep in mind so you can make your date memorable (for all the right reasons). I couldn’t help but think that it was a bit contrived and not really very well thought out.
It very much seems like she’s going through the motions of what’s ‘expected’ from women on a date – whereas, I’m more a believer of tailoring the date to suit the women, it shows a little bit of thought has gone into it and that you’re not just another person to experience a dating experience that has previously been ‘a winner’.
Here they are in all their glory (as what is now standard, I will provide my insight as to what I really think in italic J)
1. It’s okay to suggest a drink instead of dinner for a first date. (She also dreads a boring, four-course ordeal.) What I feel women dread are a generic date that no thought has gone into – a drink I fear falls into this category – you want to have a first date that you remember for all the right reasons – my first date with my beau was so well thought out. Everything we did related to something I’d mentioned to him. He even remembered my fave drink from a passing comment, he remembered the cuisine that I love (Spanish Tapas) and just in case the date went well, he’d also researched where a live soul band would be playing as he remembered that I’m in love with soul music and love to watch live music. All I’d say here is when it comes to first/ second dates – do your homework!
2. Don’t assume that just because you’re out with a beautiful woman, she knows how pretty she is – she wants to hear it from you. Let’s face it, it’s always nice to be told that you’re beautiful, hot, pretty etc but it has to come naturally, stilted or forced compliments are just cringe! Just try to notice the subtle changes – is she wearing her hair differently, does the colour of the dress suit her? The little things go a long way!
3. Men judge women according to whether they can picture having sex with them; women judge men by whether they can imagine kissing them. A set of white teeth, fresh breath and unchapped lips make her more apt to pucker up. Do we, do we really?! Erm think that is somewhat of a generalisation! I’m from the school of thought where I look at the whole package – do they make me laugh, are they cute (have I had enough tequila?! – Just joking) But seriously, yeah imagining kissing them is a given, but there’s so much more to it than that! – We’re not called complicated creatures for nothing!
4. She loves it when you insist on ordering dessert. Sharing makes it extra sexy. – What?! This is the first I’ve heard of this and let me tell you – LISA DOESN’T SHARE FOOD!!!!!!! When I want desert I order it for myself, if I want to share I’ll make that clear before, don’t just assume that I’ll be happy to have half of your chocolate cake – Us girls have needs!
5. Tip well: grab the bill, mentally divide the total by 10, double that number and throw down the tip. Do it quickly, but casually. Believe me, she’ll be watching. – I agree that it’s polite to tip, but 10% is sufficient, unless the service is notably more than acceptable and then tip as you deem necessary
6. If she touches your arm, she’s interested; if she touches your leg, she’s interested tonight. – Quite a fleeting statement here, yes if I’m touching a guys arm it might indicate that I’m interested, but there will be plenty of other signals to go with it, never just assume a women wants to go home with you if her hand grazes your leg – not an ideal philosophy to live by!
7. When in doubt, hold her hand. Erm, this again is quite an intimate gesture, maybe make sure you’re both on the same page before you hold her hand. Maybe holding the umbrella for he if it’s raining or opening the door for there are great gestures to start with. Otherwise you’re going to be pretty red faced if you go for the hand and she snatches it away!
8. Very small protective gestures go a long way and show her you’re a gentleman: offer your arm as she steps off a curb, direct her away from shards of broken glass. She’ll notice if you wait until she’s safely in her car or house before you leave. Wait the extra 90 seconds and next time you might be going in with her. This is more like it J
9. Women need momentum – without it, they lose interest or wonder if you have. Momentum is a minimum of one date a week, plus a couple of phone calls in between. I concur , nothing more annoying than not knowing where you stand and this seems to be the norm with Sydney Siders! If you like her let her know!!!
10. She knows that when you invite her over for a homemade meal or to watch a movie, it’s code for “wear something black and lacy and breakfast is on me”. Don’t play this card any earlier than date three. – This is v important, nothing creeps me out more if I get this on date too – it basically means that you can’t be bothered wining and dining her anymore and you want to get laid! Even if that’s not what it means – That’s how we take it!